Funny English status

i really wish the dollar store would start selling gas.
*****************
If I was president, all Monday’s would be changed to National Holiday..
*****************
The great thing to remember is that though our feelings come and go Gods love for us does not.
*****************
Appreciate those who love you. Help those who need you. Forgive those who hurt you. Forget those who leave you.
*****************
Smiling for someone is sweet but making someone smile is the best feeling.
*****************
Stop advertising your relationship on Facebook. Not everyone wants to see you happy.
*****************
SMILE ….. It irritates those who wish to destroy you.
*****************
Treat your parents with loving care. You will only know their value when you see their empty chair.
*****************
If you treat me like an option, I’ll leave you like a choice.
*****************
If you don’t thank GOD for every smile, then you have no right to complain about every tear.
*****************
Facebook is the only book that we read everyday.
*****************
Always remember to smile. You may not know it, but someone might be dying to see that smile everyday.
*****************
We always ignore the ones who adore us, and adore those who ignore us.
*****************
All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips
*****************
I’m thinking of you and wanted to tell you that I love you.
*****************
The lucky lover of this world! Person loves a girl without purposing her but finally he get same girl as his wife in arranged marriage.
*****************
A closed mouth is an open ear, the less you talk the more you hear.
*****************
I tried to kill a spider with hair spray. It`s still alive, but its hair looks amazing!
*****************
I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be nobody so when I see brainless people post, I can like it. And it will say nobody likes this.
*****************
Some people are like fast food…they never look as good in real life as they do on TV.
*****************
I text you because I want to have a chat with you, not to be pissed off & get my day ruined.
*****************
Never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes.
*****************
Lies That Always Worked – If you finish your food, I will buy you Ice cream.
*****************
Facebook keeps changing, updating..yet they can’t add a simple “dislike” button.
*****************
I’m not addicted to Facebook. I only time I update my status is when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
*****************
When i die don’t write “R.I.P” on my grave write “B.R.B”
*****************
I swear my pillow could be a hairstylist I always wake up with the weirdest hairdos.
*****************
About 50 percent of parents friend their children on Facebook, other 50% find less technological ways to embarrass their kids.
*****************
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
*****************
You have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. How many fish do you have? Stop counting smart one. Fish can’t drown
*****************
Don’t wait for the perfect moment…Take the moment and make it perfect…
*****************
Love is not blind
Infatuation is Blind;
love roots out all truth.
*****************
I almost exclusively update my twitter while pooping.
*****************
My friends are my estate.
*****************
True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until you lost it.
*****************
Friendship is like a violin the music may stop now and then, but the strings will last forever.
*****************
Best Friends listen to what you don’t say.
*****************
Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?
*****************
You can never be a leader unless you learn to lose.
*****************
Just wanted to let u know that you

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s